Living vicariously through myself

Ok, 21 out of 25 proves my thesis these were easier. Here are the ones nobody got:

8. I finally see the dawn arrivin' /  I see beyond the road I'm drivin' /

Far away and left behind

-- "Don't Look Back", Boston



15. Whiskey, gin and brandy / With a glass I'm pretty handy /

 I'm trying to walk a straight line / On sour mash and cheap wine

-- "Have a Drink on Me", AC/DC



17.  I go alone now, calling your name / After losing at the game

-- "Laughing", The Guess Who



23. Get a feeling of peace at the end of the day /

And when your bulldog barks and your canary sings / You're out there with winners, yeah

-- "It's Good to be King", Tom Petty

I'll do another one soon. And provide a link to e-mail me, since it's really only fair to the first person who sees the lyrics.

So I had a date with this girl Dawn I met on Yahoo last Friday, and it was laughably strange. I took her to see "In Good Company" at the theatre near my house. I arrived first and bought the tickets. We had agreed to get there early and find decent seats while there still were some and while the lights were on in the theatre. When we talked on the phone earlier in the day, she was very chatty and even accused me of being quiet. When we sat down in the theatre, she was very shy and quiet and didn't really do much to move the conversation forward. I don't know if I've ever tried so hard just to talk to someone before. It sorta reminded me of the very first thing they teach you as a communication major: Communication is a two-way street.

So we "talked" for about 15 minutes before the movie began. We talked about her classes, and she said she was a PE major because she wasn't "good at anything else". We got to talking about a debate she had in one of her classes, and I asked her what the consensus of the debate was. I then had to explain what a consensus was. In retrospect, I think this may have intimidated her. I don't ever deliberately talk over someone's head, it just kinda happened.

We watched the movie, and I don't think I heard her laugh even once. There were certainly funny parts, but she never seemed quite there. After the movie ended, she asked if we could get up and beat the crowd out. First, this is kinda odd for me. When my friends back home go see a movie, we always tend to sit through the credits and chat a little bit before he go anywhere. Dawn insisted on leaving. When we got outside the theatre, there wasn't even time to ask if she'd like to go grab a bite to eat before she said she was tired and began walking (read: Olympic SPEED-walking) back to her car. I had to laugh as I was walking back to mine how quickly she'd absconded from the premises and how little I understood what had just happened.

Let this be a lesson to me: Find the humor in women. They're good to laugh at and it sure beats trying to figure them out.

New lyrics. Same rules. Please enjoy responsibly. I think these are easier, on the whole.

1. I never saw no miracle of science / That didn't go from a blessing to a curse /

I never saw no military solution / That didn't always end up as something worse

-- "If I Ever Lose My Faith in You" - Sting and the Police (Rob)



2.  Look like nothing's gonna change / Everything still remains the same / 

I can't do what ten people tell me to do / So I guess I'll remain the same, yes

-- "Sittin' on the Dock of the Bay", Otis Redding (Alma)



3.  Deep down in his soul / She can bring him such misery /

If she is playing him for a fool /  He's the last one to know

-- "When a Man Loves a Woman", Percy Sledge/Michael Bolton  (Alma)



4. Do you remember when we used to sing / Sha la la la la la la la la la la ti da

-- "Brown-Eyed Girl", Van Morrison (Alma)



5. Tambourines and elephants are playing in the band. / Won’t you take a ride on the flyin’ spoon?

-- "Lookin' Out My Back Door", CCR (Megan)



6. Well, no one told me about her / The way she lied /

Well, no one told me about her / How many people cried

-- "She's Not There", The Zombies (Alma)



7. You studyin' hard and hopin' to pass / Workin' your fingers right down to the bone

-- "School Days", Chuck Berry (Amanda, to whom I was nice...)



8. I finally see the dawn arrivin' /  I see beyond the road I'm drivin' /

Far away and left behind



9. Don't go trying some new fashion / Don't change the color of your hair /

You always have my unspoken passion / Although I might not seem to care

-- "Just The Way Your Are", Billy Joel (Greg)



10.  Watching, waiting, commiserating /  Say it ain't so, I will not go, turn the lights off, carry me home

-- "All The Small Things", Blink-182 (Alma)



11. If I could make days last forever / If words could make wishes come true /

I'd save every day like a treasure and then, / Again, I would spend them with you

-- "Time in a Bottle", Jim Croce (Mike)



12.  See, don't ever set me free / I always wanna be by your side

-- "You Really Got Me", The Kinks (Mike)



13.  Don’t you know you fool, you never can win / Use your mentality, wake up to reality /

But each time I do, just the thought of you / Makes me stop before I begin

-- "I've Got You Under My Skin", Frank Sinatra (Megan)



14.  I stopped into a church / I passed along the way / well I got down on my knees / And I pretend to pray

-- "California Dreamin'", The Mamas and the Papas (Alma)



15. Whiskey, gin and brandy / With a glass I'm pretty handy / I'm trying to walk a straight line / On sour mash and cheap wine



16. Hide it in a hiding place / Where no one ever goes. / Put it in you pantry with your cupcakes.

-- "Mrs. Robinson", Simon and Garfunkel (Alma and Amanda)



17.  I go alone now, calling your name / After losing at the game



18.  Sorry girl but you missed out / Well tough luck, that boy's mine now /

We are more than just good friends / This is how the story ends

-- "Sk8er Boi", Avril Lavigne (Alma, who I think is disgusted with herself)



19.  Mother told me, yes, she told me I'd meet girls like you. /

She also told me, "Stay away, you'll never know what you'll catch."

-- "Surrender", Cheap Trick (Rob)



20.  Fe fe fi fi fo fo fum, / All looking down the street cause here she comes

-- "Devil in a Blue Dress", Mitch Ryder and the Detroit Wheels (Mike)



21.  Well you can take it as a warning /  Or take it anyway you like /

It's the lightning, not the thunder / You never know where it's gonna strike

-- "Jeopardy", Greg Kihn (Greg)



22. She oughtta think twice. / She oughtta do right by me. / Before she gets to sayin' goodbye

-- "Ticket to Ride", The Beatles (Alma)



23. Get a feeling of peace at the end of the day /

And when your bulldog barks and your canary sings / You're out there with winners, yeah



24. Bert Kaempfert’s got the mad hits / You try to match wits

-- "One Week", Barenaked Ladies (Alma)



25.  I was beat incomplete / I'd been had, I was sad and blue /

But you made me feel / Yeah, you made me feel / Shiny and new

-- "Like a Virgin", Madonna (Amanda)

Ok, here are the ones people missed. I tried to make sure the songs would be recognizable to almost everyone if you heard them. That way, it's at least fun to be able to hear the lyrics in your head, which hopefully makes the game worth playing.



1. I killed myself from the inside out / And all my fears have pushed you out / And I wished for things that I don't need
-- "Sympathy", Goo Goo Dolls

2.Everyone learned to live together, ah-hah-unh / Seems to me such an itty bitty thing should be / Why can't you and me learn to love one another?
-- "People Got To Be Free", The Rascals

11. I been running trying to get hung up in my mind / Got to give myself a little talking to this time / Just need a little brain salad surgery / Got to cure my insecurity
-- "Right Place, Wrong Time", Dr. John

13. Like a fly on the wall with my secret eyes / Takin it in, try to be feminine / With my makeup bag watchin all the sin
-- "Hey Baby", No Doubt

14. Had me a couple of real nice girlfriends / Stopped by to see me every once in a while / When I think back about those days / All I can do is sit and smile
-- "Cherry Bomb", John Mellencamp (Greg guessed "Summer of '69", whose story arc is similar, you could argue)

16. Hoes frown when you pass yeah, they mad yeah / You gon' ride in the Jag yeah, with that head / You could smoke or buy a bag yeah, of grass yeah /Got money I can flash yeah, and trash yeah
-- "Back Dat Azz Up", Juvenile

17. No resident of France But you swear I'm from Paris, 106 karats, oh lord that's pure rich. Tryin' 2 compare this, my chain to yo' chain, I'm like sprint and motorlola no service outta your range.
-- "Number One", Nelly (What? Were you all too shocked I have rap on my computer?)

21. The shadows high on the darker side / Behind those doors, it's a wilder ride / You can make a break, you can win or lose
-- "The Heat is On", Glenn Frey

22. The months roll past the love that you struck dead / Did you love me only in my head? / Things you said and did to me, seemed to come so easily / The love I thought I'd won you give for free.
-- "Found Out About You", Gin Blossoms

23. I'm so darn glad he let me try it again / Cause my last time on earth I lived a whole world of sin / I'm so glad that I know more than I knew then.
-- "Higher Ground", Stevie Wonder

24. Some babe's talkin' real loud / Talkin' all about the new crowd / Try and sell me an old dream / A new version of the old scene
-- "Rag Doll", Aerosmith

Ok, here are the ones people got. A nice job by everyone who played. If you all played as a trash team, I myself would stay away from being on the opposing team.

3. It's getting near dawn, When lights close their tired eyes. I'll soon be with you my love, To give you my dawn surprise.
-- "Sunshine of Your Love"; Rob is right, it's Cream, my version is by Bobby McFerrin (Rob)

4. Don't look past my shoulder / The exodus is here/ The happy ones are near
-- "Baba O'Reilly"; The Who (Amanda)

5. Been walking my mind to an easy time my back turned towards the sun /
Lord knows when the cold wind blows it'll turn your head around
-- "Fire and Rain"; again, Rob is correct and it's really James Taylor, but on my computer it's Bobby Darin (Rob)

6. You are here, so am I / Maybe millions of people go by / But they all disappear from view
-- "I Only Have Eyes For You"; Lots of people, but my version is Art Garfunkel...sorry... (Alma)

7. The first mate he got drunk / And broke in the Cap'n's trunk / The constable had to come and take him away / Sheriff John Stone
-- "Sloop John B"; The Beach Boys (Alma)

8.With flowers and my love both never to come back /I see people turn their heads and quickly look away /Like a new born baby it just happens ev'ry day
-- "Paint it Black"; The Rolling Stones (Rob)

9. There's nothing but the rain / No footsteps on the ground / I'm listening but there's no sound
-- "I'm with You"; Avril Lavigne (Renita)

10. You're asking me will my love grow / I don't know, I don't know / You stick around now it may show / I don't know, I don't know
-- "Something"; The Beatles (Rob)

12. Yeah, down by the river / Down by the banks of the river Charles / That's where you'll find me / Along with lovers, muggers, and thieves
-- "Dirty Water", The Standells (Greg)

15. Why not think about times to come, And not about the things that you’ve done, If your life was bad to you, Just think what tomorrow will do.
-- "Don't Stop", Fleetwood Mac (Greg)

18. Says she's close to understanding Jesus / She knows she's more that just a little misunderstood / She has trouble acting normal when she's nervous
-- "Round Here"; Counting Crows (Renita)

19. When I come home feelin' tired and beat / I go up where the air is fresh and sweet / I get away from the hustling crowd / And all that rat-race noise down in the street
-- "Up On The roof"; The Drifters (Alma)

20. Well I don't really know her, I only know her name / But she crawls under your skin, you're never quite the same
-- "Invisible Touch"; Genesis (Amanda)

25. Ooh, I bet you're wond'rin' how I knew / 'bout your plans to make me blue / With some other guy you knew before / Between the two of us guys you know I love you more
-- "Heard It Through the Grapevine"; Marvin (not a Raisin, as far as we know) Gaye (Alma)

Good response so far. Here's who got what right, and what is left:


1. I killed myself from the inside out / And all my fears have pushed you out / And I wished for things that I don't need

2.Everyone learned to live together, ah-hah-unh / Seems to me such an itty bitty thing should be / Why can't you and me learn to love one another?

3. It's getting near dawn, When lights close their tired eyes. I'll soon be with you my love, To give you my dawn surprise.
-- "Sunshine of Your Love"; Rob is right, it's Cream, my version is by Bobby McFerrin (Rob)

4. Don't look past my shoulder / The exodus is here/ The happy ones are near
-- "Baba O'Reilly"; The Who (Amanda)

5. Been walking my mind to an easy time my back turned towards the sun /
Lord knows when the cold wind blows it'll turn your head around
-- "Fire and Rain"; again, Rob is correct and it's really James Taylor, but on my computer it's Bobby Darin (Rob)

6. You are here, so am I / Maybe millions of people go by / But they all disappear from view
-- "I Only Have Eyes For You"; Lots of people, but my version is Art Garfunkel...sorry... (Alma)

7. The first mate he got drunk / And broke in the Cap'n's trunk / The constable had to come and take him away / Sheriff John Stone
-- "Sloop John B"; The Beach Boys (Alma)

8.With flowers and my love both never to come back /I see people turn their heads and quickly look away /Like a new born baby it just happens ev'ry day
-- "Paint it Black"; The Rolling Stones (Rob)

9. There's nothing but the rain / No footsteps on the ground / I'm listening but there's no sound
-- "I'm with You"; Avril Lavigne (Renita)

10. You're asking me will my love grow / I don't know, I don't know / You stick around now it may show / I don't know, I don't know
-- "Something"; The Beatles (Rob)

11. I been running trying to get hung up in my mind / Got to give myself a little talking to this time / Just need a little brain salad surgery / Got to cure my insecurity

12. Yeah, down by the river / Down by the banks of the river Charles / That's where you'll find me / Along with lovers, muggers, and thieves
-- "Dirty Water", The Standells (Greg)

13. Like a fly on the wall with my secret eyes / Takin it in, try to be feminine / With my makeup bag watchin all the sin

14. Had me a couple of real nice girlfriends / Stopped by to see me every once in a while / When I think back about those days / All I can do is sit and smile

15. Why not think about times to come, And not about the things that you’ve done, If your life was bad to you, Just think what tomorrow will do.
-- "Don't Stop", Fleetwood Mac (Greg)

16. Hoes frown when you pass yeah, they mad yeah / You gon' ride in the Jag yeah, with that head / You could smoke or buy a bag yeah, of grass yeah /Got money I can flash yeah, and trash yeah

17. No resident of France But you swear I'm from Paris, 106 karats, oh lord that's pure rich. Tryin' 2 compare this, my chain to yo' chain, I'm like sprint and motorlola no service outta your range.

18. Says she's close to understanding Jesus / She knows she's more that just a little misunderstood / She has trouble acting normal when she's nervous
-- "Round Here"; Counting Crows (Renita)

19. When I come home feelin' tired and beat / I go up where the air is fresh and sweet / I get away from the hustling crowd / And all that rat-race noise down in the street
-- "Up On The roof"; The Drifters (Alma)

20. Well I don't really know her, I only know her name / But she crawls under your skin, you're never quite the same
-- "Invisible Touch"; Genesis (Amanda)

21. The shadows high on the darker side / Behind those doors, it's a wilder ride / You can make a break, you can win or lose

22. The months roll past the love that you struck dead / Did you love me only in my head? / Things you said and did to me, seemed to come so easily / The love I thought I'd won you give for free.

23. I'm so darn glad he let me try it again / Cause my last time on earth I lived a whole world of sin / I'm so glad that I know more than I knew then.

24. Some babe's talkin' real loud / Talkin' all about the new crowd / Try and sell me an old dream / A new version of the old scene

25. Ooh, I bet you're wond'rin' how I knew / 'bout your plans to make me blue / With some other guy you knew before / Between the two of us guys you know I love you more
-- "Heard It Through the Grapevine"; Marvin (not a Raisin, as far as we know) Gaye (Alma)

Ok, I'll be a lemming...

Here are the 25 song lyrics. I cheated a little bit (you'll thank me in a minute). Since I have something like 8,000 songs on my computer, I only picked the song if I'd ever heard of it. There's a lot of music on my computer I'll never listen to. So you, the reader, benefit from the cheating. Just think -- when's the last time someone else cheated and YOU benefitted from it? That's what I thought. Post answers in the comments and when people get some right, I'll do what Alma did and tell you who was right and what's left.

1. I killed myself from the inside out / And all my fears have pushed you out / And I wished for things that I don't need

2.Everyone learned to live together, ah-hah-unh / Seems to me such an itty bitty thing should be / Why can't you and me learn to love one another?

3. It's getting near dawn, When lights close their tired eyes. I'll soon be with you my love,
To give you my dawn surprise.

4. Don't look past my shoulder / The exodus is here/ The happy ones are near

5. Been walking my mind to an easy time my back turned towards the sun /
Lord knows when the cold wind blows it'll turn your head around

6. You are here, so am I / Maybe millions of people go by / But they all disappear from view

7. The first mate he got drunk / And broke in the Cap'n's trunk / The constable had to come and take him away / Sheriff John Stone

8.With flowers and my love both never to come back /I see people turn their heads and quickly look away /Like a new born baby it just happens ev'ry day

9. There's nothing but the rain / No footsteps on the ground / I'm listening but there's no sound

10. You're asking me will my love grow / I don't know, I don't know / You stick around now it may show / I don't know, I don't know

11. I been running trying to get hung up in my mind / Got to give myself a little talking to this time / Just need a little brain salad surgery / Got to cure my insecurity

12. Yeah, down by the river / Down by the banks of the river Charles / That's where you'll find me / Along with lovers, muggers, and thieves

13. Like a fly on the wall with my secret eyes / Takin it in, try to be feminine / With my makeup bag watchin all the sin

14. Had me a couple of real nice girlfriends / Stopped by to see me every once in a while / When I think back about those days / All I can do is sit and smile

15. Why not think about times to come, And not about the things that you’ve done, If your life was bad to you, Just think what tomorrow will do.

16. Hoes frown when you pass yeah, they mad yeah / You gon' ride in the Jag yeah, with that head / You could smoke or buy a bag yeah, of grass yeah /Got money I can flash yeah, and trash yeah

17. No resident of France But you swear I'm from Paris, 106 karats, oh lord that's pure rich. Tryin' 2 compare this, my chain to yo' chain, I'm like sprint and motorlola no service outta your range.

18. Says she's close to understanding Jesus / She knows she's more that just a little misunderstood / She has trouble acting normal when she's nervous

19. When I come home feelin' tired and beat / I go up where the air is fresh and sweet / I get away from the hustling crowd / And all that rat-race noise down in the street

20. Well I don't really know her, I only know her name / But she crawls under your skin, you're never quite the same,

21. The shadows high on the darker side / Behind those doors, it's a wilder ride / You can make a break, you can win or lose

22. The months roll past the love that you struck dead / Did you love me only in my head? / Things you said and did to me, seemed to come so easily / The love I thought I'd won you give for free.

23. I'm so darn glad he let me try it again / Cause my last time on earth I lived a whole world of sin / I'm so glad that I know more than I knew then.

24. Some babe's talkin' real loud / Talkin' all about the new crowd / Try and sell me an old dream / A new version of the old scene

25. Ooh, I bet you're wond'rin' how I knew / 'bout your plans to make me blue / With some other guy you knew before / Between the two of us guys you know I love you more

So I caved in and spent money on Yahoo's Personals service. My trouble with the whole thing is that I'm very picky. I always tend to make a lot of categories non-negotiable when making it search for a woman. And I only ever look for profiles that include photos. I do this for two reasons: 1. I want to know who to look for should I ever meet them in real life and 2. this shows me they're at least intelligent enough to figure out how to post a picture. So if she's pretty and not in the shallow end of the gene pool, I figure we're off to a good enough start.

But maybe the thing I pay the MOST attention to? Punctuation. For the love of professional surfer Bjorn Dunkerbeck, people, LEARN TO USE CAPITAL LETTERS AND PERIODS! A used shift key is a happy shift key. This also shows whether the person is lazy or not. If you type well, you at least care what other people think of your mind which, to recap, is A GOOD THING.

Long story short, I've been sort of talking to this one girl who seems fun. We've exchanged messages but keeping missing one another to talk online. Hopefully this weekend. Keep your DNA double helixes crossed. If you don't, then you're probably not long for reading this anyway.